Not just a glance

The dagger was thrown
with the skill and accuracy
of years of practice
and a finely honed talent.
The edge glint
in the sun light
as it neared its target.
A deadly steel
that could rend flesh
so easily if it hit is mark
as the thrower
had envisioned.
If only looks could really kill.
__________________________________

This is a Flash Fiction Friday 55.

If you want to know what the hell that means visit g-man.

The challenge is on.

Or come back on Sunday to try my Sunday 160.

If you can fill a text message, you can do this.

Colloquialisms

Visiting the town where my grandparents lived and my parents grew up got me to reminiscing about them. My Dad and Grand Dad had a bucketful of sayings which got me thinking and trying to recall some of their more interesting colloquialisms I've heard over the years. Here is a small collection of the sayings and who I attribute them to.

"Like a fart in a skillet" - my dad would say this about anyone who was twitchy, indecisive or annoyingly energetic. You know the type. You may even be one.

"Not worth sour owl shit" - Dad again. Never did figure out how he would know if owl shit was sour.

"Even a broken clock is right twice a day" - Dad was always eager to point out how often he was right and how stupid others could be. I believe he was truly amazed when someone he felt was not up to his standard of perfection would actually get something right. I also know he didn't make this one up. He just liked it.

"Wop Slop" - anytime my mom would make a dinner with red sauce, my father would refer to it as wop slop. In this he provided me my first lessons in sensitivity.

"Slip me a slobber" - my Grand Dad's way of saying 'give me a kiss'. This is the man who taught me that it was okay to pee behind the barn if I couldn't make it back to the house in time.

"Give me a Road Shortener" - Grand Dad's reference to handing him a beer before he took off on a road trip. It was an easier, softer time when the cops would escort you home.

"Slicker 'n' cow slobbers" - Grand Dad of course. He was a farmer who apparently had a saliva fetish. Sometimes I wondered about his relationship with his cattle.

"Picking fly shit out of pepper" - An old boss used to day this about people who found his work just not quite good enough. Perhaps a bit more detail oriented than he was.

"Jumping over dollars to pick up dimes" - same guy when talking about people who would spend money stupidly thinking they would gain from it.

Then there are a few from one of my more anally obsessed friends - Tighter than a chickenhawk's ass in a full dive & Tighter than a gnats ass stretched across a rain barrel. We won't go down the road of women in religious positions.

We have all had those friends or relatives who love sayings. Maybe you're one of them. In any case.....show me your stuff.

17

This last weekend Mrs MM and I took off to celebrate our seventeenth wedding anniversary. We travelled to one of our favorite little towns in Oregon - Hood River. We spent much of our early relationship in the area which is called the Columbia River Gorge. An area very dear to us both.

While we typically travel the area between our home town, Portland, and Hood River enjoying the hiking trails and waterfalls, we decided for our weekend away we would travel further east along the Gorge. It is still beautiful, but just not as green. Here in Oregon, we refer to this part of our state as the "High Desert" country. These are a few photos of the sites we took in.

We took off from Hood River and went about 40 miles east to the Mary Hill Museum. The museum was built by Samuel Hill, "the catalyst behind the Columbia River Highway", to be his eastern ranch. Due to issue of travel during that time period, the early 1900's, he ended up dedicating his home as a museum instead.

Mary Hill Museum Grounds Entry

On a very park like grounds that is open to the public are a number of sculptures. Including the rather whimsical "Taco Bell", a bell hanging from a bar that has a sculpted taco on it. This was my favorite. Mrs.MM with the Pine Cone. Inside the museum are collections of artwork from Czar Nicholas, Rodin, fascinating chess sets, painting on loan from various private collections and items that leave you scratching your head wondering what the heck are these beautiful works doing out in the middle of nowhere.


Czar Nicholas


Monkey chess pieces...how could I resist.

Then beyond the Mary Hill Museum we went.


Sam Hill's Stonehenge Memorial to WWI


An old barn outside Goldendale, WA I had to shoot.


Wind turbine farm.

And back to Hood River for a romantic dinner. (Mrs. MM hates sentences that start with And, but I had to do it.)

Imperfect

You expect perfection in others

but expertly overlook

your own imperfections.

Set the example

of your expectation

and see how comfortable

you feel in that skin.

________________________________

This is a Sunday 160.
Take the Challenge if you dare. Write a story using 160 characters - including spaces. Your cell phone will tell you if you have reached 160...but cell phones lie...they usually have only 144 to 150. If you want "perfection" in your count, use word count in Office Word and check the character count there. It sure beats counting. Or just say "screw it" and send a maxed out text. Have fun. - MM

It's a Crime

The pulsing light of a television bled

throughout the room

as the only form of illumination.

The stench of soiled clothes

and months of dirty dishes

made this a crime scene

unlike any other.

Where do you start

or do you just turn around

knowing this is one case

that will never be resolved.

Teenagers.

__________________________________
This is a Flash Fiction Friday 55.

If you want to know what the hell that means visit g-man. The challenge is on.

Or come back on Sunday to try my Sunday 160.

If you can fill a text message, you can do this.

Pets and Peeves

There are a number of blogs I have read that go under such titles as Cheers & Jeers or Rants & Raves and I have truly enjoyed reading them (thanks Green Eyed Momster who credits Little Ms. Blogger who I am ashamed to say I have only recently visited). That was run on. I have also been tempted to join the fray, but have this ego that just won't allow me to write without originality in concept.

Well, ego be damned. I keep seeing things that fall into these love it or leave it categories and are great fodder for a rant or a rave, a cheer or a jeer and in my case, because I want to be different, a Pet or a Peeve. I am not following the Rant and Rave Wednesday format that is short and concise due to the fact that my opinions are bloated and I like to hear myself go on and on.

So Here are a few of my Pets and Peeves.

Pet - Family Game Night. No particular night. Just whenever we feel like it, we bring out Cranium, Pictionary, Wise and Otherwise or Pretty Pretty Princess. You should see us in plastic crown, earrings and necklace.

Peeve - Ridiculous redundancies people say all the time. Like past history - as opposed to future history; reduce down (duh!); and also (I've seen this in newspapers and heard it on radio....come on); and UPC code - UPC stands for Universal Product Code so you are saying Universal Product Code Code - I hate that.

Pet - Card stores. I love buying cards. We have a local card shop with cards I can't find anywhere else. Cards that say things like, "You're a fucking Rock Star" and "Sorry I was such a dick" and "I just fucking love you." I stocked up on the Sorry card - I really can be a dick.

Peeve - Our landlord, who is actually a developer. Perhaps I should refer to him as the developer posing as a landlord. He calls up one day and tells Mrs. MM "Just wanted to let you know I have decided to put the house you have spent hours painting and making livable up for sale. You don't mind if I interrupt your family's life by running realtors and tire kicking potential buyers through your house at a moments notice, do you?" We polished this turd of a house for him to the point that it has charm and is presentable - inside and out. Afterall, we live in it. So this is what we get in return. Mr. Developerlandlord is now and forever known as Chicken Fucker.

Pet - The Blogosphere. I admit I am hooked. I have been pulled in by creative writing and the way you all really care and show it. You are a great bunch and I have been adding so many blogs to follow that it is becoming difficult to stay on top of it. I need to remind myself that family and job come first and you are just a fun addition. I have come to love and appreciate you all.

Peeve - Ignorance. I once had a bumper sticker that read - Too bad ignorance isn't painful. I still feel that way.

Pet - Giving recognition to people in Blogland. I recently passed on an award to a few bloggers. But I didn't include my favorite blog - Pheromone Girl Grows Up. This is one of the most talented writers I have ever been exposed to. She sucks you into her stories and leaves you begging for more. Be sure to stop by and go to some of the older posts from her blog as Pheromone Girl. I hope she writes a book someday. I will be the first in line to buy it. I love her.

Pet - October 9. My anniversary with Mrs. Monkey Man. We will spend this weekend away from the Internet and in loving bliss.

So there you have it - Pets and Peeves. Don't know if this will be a regular post for me, but it will definitely be part of the notes I keep in the Moleskine Mrs. MM gave to me. (She is so awesome and thoughtful.)

Good-bye 160

Blackness covered the day.

Trees shivered to shed their leaves.

Skin disappeared.

Fingers replaced by wool.

Skies cried in grief.

Summer ends

in a thunder clap.

________________________________

This is a Sunday 160.
Take the Challenge if you dare.

Over the Top Award

I recently received this award from Green Eyed Momster who is a kick in the pants. Thank you
GEM. It is called the "Over the Top" Award and I am humbled to be recognized. (I am so insecure that any attention I get causes devotion and drooling.) I jokingly referred to this award as a chain letter award, but was informed by the lovely and much more talented than I, Mrs. Monkey Man, that is is called a meme.

So here are the rules of this meme award as passed down to me by the fore-winners (is there such a thing).

1. Answer the questions below using only one word (Good! My simple mind couldn't handle more than that.)

2. Thank the blogger who gave it to you (What's next, bow to your partner and doe see doe?)

C. Pass it on to 6 of your favorite bloggers (Shown below.)


So, now the questions:

1. Where is your cell phone? Pocket

2. Your hair? Gone

3. Your mother? Guilt

4. Your father? Passed

5. Your favorite food? Steak

6. Your dream last night? Sex

7. Your favorite drink? Water

8. Your dream/goal? Happiness (ditto!)

9. What room are you in? Bedroom

10. Your hobby? Walking

11. Your fear? Failure

12. Where do you want to be in 6 years? Loved

13. Where were you last night? Restaurant

14. Something you aren't? Patient

15. Muffins? Banananut (OK it’s not really one word)

16. Wish list item? Motorcycle

17. Where did you grow up? Portland

18. Last thing you did? Changed

19. What are you wearing? Jeans (ditto!)

20. Your TV? Off

21. Your pets? Doofus

22. Your friends? Caring

23. Your life? Transitioning

24. Your mood? Thoughtful

25. Missing someone? Dad

26. Vehicle? Explorer

27. Something you're not wearing? Shoes (ditto!)

28. Your favorite store? Resale

29. Your favorite color? Blue

30. When was the last time you laughed? Minutes

31. Last time you cried? Thursday

32. Your best friend? Wife

33. One place that I go over and over? Park

34. One person who emails me regularly? Dennis

35. Favorite place to eat? McCormack's

I included a (ditto!) when I had the same answer as GE Momster because she did the same thing for the person who passed it on to her and I am a copycat. This was fun but now I have to pick six, which will be hard. So I choose -

Chronicles of a Croydon Boy (reveal yourself Phillip)
Let Me Go On and On (you are amazing)

Adventures of One Sober Woman (you adventurer you)

This is harder than answering the questions

Sixtyfivewhatnow (my fellow Orgonian)

The Peach Tart (love you Peach)

and Mr. Knowitall (that's for getting me hooked on that 55 bs - love that too)

I also want to plug The Walking Man because he is talented and I follow him, but know he wouldn't do this award business.

So have fun accepting this award you six and I'd say let me know when you post, but since i follow all of you, I'll know anyway. Love you all. Enjoy.

Red Angel

The argument was getting too heated.

Both parties stood glaring,

pink faced with veins

popping everywhere.

Silence suddenly

overtook the room,

forcing calm and

reducing blood pressure.

They turned to face

the perpetrator

of this most profound

and mysterious occurrence.

Floating above the fray

was the sage Red Angel.

Kind words and logic then prevailed.

__________________________________
This is a Flash Fiction Friday 55.

If you want to know what the hell that means visit g-man. The challenge is on.

Or Try my Sunday 160.

If you can fill a text messages, you can do this.

Just Because...

I have made a few observations that I want to share. They all begin with....
Just because....
...you own an expensive car doesn't mean you know how to drive.
...your hair and nails are perfect doesn't mean you look skinny.
...your dog will fit in a purse doesn't mean it can't walk.
...your signal works doesn't mean you should leave it on for 10 miles.
...you are alone in your car doesn't mean people can't see you pick your nose.
...you own a cell phone doesn't mean everyone wants to hear your conversation.
...you have a bluetooth ear piece doesn't mean you look any less crazy talking to yourself.
...your children can run free in a restaurant doesn't mean they should.
...your S2000 may look like a sports car it's still a Honda.
...your daddy was president and you went to an Ivy League school doesn't mean you have a brain in your head.
...you know the words to a song doesn't mean you can carry a tune.
...you can play softball at 40 doesn't mean you are an athlete.
...you have your turn signal on doesn't mean you can merge into my lane without looking.

I was going to add "Just because you can make a list doesn't mean you can write." but I would have been dissing myself and a number of very entertaining blogs I keep up on. I hope you enjoyed this and I hope you will add a few of your own.....just because.