Monday, September 28, 2009

Just Because...

I have made a few observations that I want to share. They all begin with....
Just because.... own an expensive car doesn't mean you know how to drive.
...your hair and nails are perfect doesn't mean you look skinny.
...your dog will fit in a purse doesn't mean it can't walk.
...your signal works doesn't mean you should leave it on for 10 miles. are alone in your car doesn't mean people can't see you pick your nose. own a cell phone doesn't mean everyone wants to hear your conversation. have a bluetooth ear piece doesn't mean you look any less crazy talking to yourself.
...your children can run free in a restaurant doesn't mean they should.
...your S2000 may look like a sports car it's still a Honda.
...your daddy was president and you went to an Ivy League school doesn't mean you have a brain in your head. know the words to a song doesn't mean you can carry a tune. can play softball at 40 doesn't mean you are an athlete. have your turn signal on doesn't mean you can merge into my lane without looking.

I was going to add "Just because you can make a list doesn't mean you can write." but I would have been dissing myself and a number of very entertaining blogs I keep up on. I hope you enjoyed this and I hope you will add a few of your own.....just because.


Green-Eyed Momster said...

OMG, Monkey Man, This post is pure genius. I can't believe how it resonates with what is going on in my life right now.
You touched on so many topics with me, it isn't even funny. Wow! Very well done, my friend!

I'll just add a couple of my own:

...You have a college degree doesn't mean you have common sense. (Not about anyone but my dad)

....You think that ignoring your kids when they're screaming in public doesn't mean that they'll stop. And, everyone else can still hear them! (I went to Walmart yesterday)

Great post!

Monkey Man said...

Amen to the college degree. Overrated. Kids in the restaurant....same deal as your Walmart experience. Parent is also be a verb.

listen for azure said...

Just because you gave birth doesn't mean that everyone on the planet wants to hear about your placenta, your birth experience or your brat. Especially that last part.

the walking man said... break wind and don't fart doesn't mean your shit don't stink.

PhilipH said...

A list of truisms if I ever saw one! The loud, gobby mobile phone user is one of the worst, most ignorant sub-humans around!

Nessa said...

Great list.

Just because you have money doesn't mean you have any taste.

Just because you are infamous doesn't mean you have any talent.

The Peach Tart said...

I love your list. Another one...just because you have lots of money doesn't make you better than everybody else.

Anonymous said...

Love the nose picking ~ especially coming from Colorado where "everyone does it".

Just because ...

...she flirted with you, you didn't have to F**K her. [oops, did I say that out loud?]

Love the list ...

~Chef Kar

Grace said...

I enjoyed reading this post, Monkey Man. Thanks for sharing your thoughts to us. :)

Green-Eyed Momster said...

.....just because your comments are funny and you're a freakin' genius....I gave you an award!

Matty said...

Love this list MM.

How about......just because you're wealthy, doesn't make you better than me.

......just because you're my boss, doesn't make you smarter or better than me.