Saturday, October 29, 2011

Sunday 160 - Lost

Wandering aimlessly, 
he refused to believe 
he could be lost. 
Food & water – gone. 
He teetered 
on the brink of panic 
and then remembered 
it was only a corn maze.

If you want to play along with the Sunday 160. Here are the rules.

1. The Sunday 160 only uses EXACTLY 160 characters (including spaces).
2. Keep on schedule - post after 8:00 PM Pacific Time on Saturday.
3. Let me know you have posted via a comment on my site.
(Be sure to mention you have posted a 160. Provide a link if you can)
4. Visit at least one other Sunday 160 writer.

Thursday, October 27, 2011

55 - Implants?

“Did you read about the Danish study that concluded radiation from cell phones doesn’t increase the risk of cancer or tumors in the brain?”

“Yah, I suppose now cell phone manufacturers will try to figure out a way to implant phones directly into our heads.”

“Well, that’s one way to do away with butt dialing.”


This is a Flash Fiction Friday 55
hosted by Mr. Knowitall.
For more 55's pay him a visit -
Mr. Knowitall.

If you think Micro Fictions are fun. 
Come join me for a Sunday 160.
A challenge using exactly 160 characters
in a story, poem or writing of your choice.

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

What The Hell Wednesday - What a Bunch of Bologna

What The Hell Wednesday has posted a number of stories that fall under the category of "This can't possibly be true", but I am here to tell you that this one is the topper. I only ask one question with this report - "Why?"

Bologna Smuggler Caught at Border

ALBUQUERQUE, N.M. -- A New Mexico resident has been cited after federal officials say he tried to smuggle 76 pounds of bologna into the U.S. from Mexico by hiding it in a spare tire.

U.S. Customs and Border Protection said last week that the eight rolls of Mexican bologna were discovered aboard a truck at an El Paso port of entry on Friday.

According to officials, officers detected an anomaly in the appearance of a Ford F-150 as it arrived at the Paso Del Norte international crossing port. Agents scanned the spare tire with a "Buster" density meter.

When they opened the spare tire, officials said agents found the bologna hidden inside

The driver was assessed a $1,000 civil penalty and was released.

Really? Bologna? Oscar Mayer not good enough for you? Something extra special hidden in the Mexican bologna? Longer lasting than putting air in your spare? Why not just declare it?

Oh! You say you can't bring prepared meat from Mexico into the US? Then that must be some pretty tasty bologna. Or just cheap. Then again, it's not so cheap when it costs you a civil penalty of $1000.00 or $13,526.56 Mexican Pesos for those keeping track of the monetary exchange across the border.

But for me it just keeps coming back to bologna. Bologna? Do you know what's in that stuff? It's like a flattened hot dog. Does that tell you enough? It's finely ground "sausage" with lard added to it. Yup. Lard.

Can you just image what goes into bologna where processing plants don't have the FDA breathing down their necks? Makes me gag just thinking about it.

But I do get a real chuckle out of picturing the looks on the border patrols' faces when they open up a spare tire thinking "Huge drug bust....great glory for us" and they find.....bologna....76 pounds of bologna. There is no doubt in my mind they literally screamed "What the Hell?"