Thursday, November 24, 2011

55 - Burdened

Struggling to get a full grip with his situation, 
he felt the weight of the world on his shoulders. 
Gasping for air under the extreme crush, 
he was panicked over the constraint. 
How would he extract himself from this situation? 
Then he heard, 
“Get off your father’s back, you two. 
You know he gets claustrophobic.”

This is a Flash Fiction Friday 55
hosted by Mr. Knowitall.
For more 55's pay him a visit -
Mr. Knowitall.

If you think Micro Fictions are fun. 
Come join me for a Sunday 160.
A challenge using exactly 160 characters
in a story, poem or writing of your choice.
Happy Thanksgiving to you all.


Scarlet said...

Ha..ha...I do like the picture ~

Happy thanksgiving ~

Brian Miller said...

ha. so they are like my boys...they have learned ways to make me hurt when we wrestle...

happy thanksgiving monkey

Katherine Krige said...


whew, thank goodness they got off. Now you can enjoy your turkey dinner! Happy Thanksgiving Monkey!

Sub Radar (Mike) said...

Woah, that picture is intense.

Cathy Feaster said...

haha...boys like to be boys :) Happy Thanksgiving, MM :)

Ann (bunnygirl) said...

Give them time. They'll come up with something far worse!

Monkey Man said...

At 17 & 19, my two are a bit old for this type of horse play, but this was conjured by some old memories.

G-Man said...

Atlas had a Father?
And a Mother?
Now a 55?
Great Job MM.
Thanks for playing, Happy Thanksgiving to you, Rachel, and your beautiful family.
Have a Kick Ass Week-End

Christine said...

love those horsey ride memories on my Dad's back, I'm sure our body weight wasn't all that he hand on his shoulders either

Margaret said...

ha! Those boys need to take it easy on the old man... especially when he has a full tummy! :) In a few years, the grandkids will "arrive" and will weigh a lot less!

Unknown said...

Phew! Rescued.

anthonynorth said...

Loved the ending, and the pic is great.

MorningAJ said...

When I was starting to get too big for piggy-backs my dad used to tell me he couldn't carry me because 'I've got a bone in my arm'. Took me ages to catch on to the fact that I was being conned!

Anonymous said...

LOL, great last few lines, really enjoyed that 55!


Green Monkey said...

Happy back at you ..... from monkey me to monkey you.

Pratibha said...

ha ! sweet burden isnt it ?

Unknown said...

Cute. They are the weight of the world, aren't they? Love that picture too.

Dr. Heckle said...

I thought maybe it was two really fat cats...

Kids makes more sense.

Julie Ferguson said...

I know how he felt. I am claustrophobic too.

Anonymous said...

I remember those days... all five of us kids used to pin my Dad (and he, exhausted from running a chainsaw and logging all day, let us) and take great pride in seeing how long we could hold on.

Usually, not for long. In his day, he was a State wrestling champ. He never forgot his moves.

Loved the photo you used for this one- you do a great job of adding a neat twist at the end and confounding the reader.

Anonymous said...

nice hook....when my son reach 200 pounds (@14) I tossed in the towel


Cloudia said...


resolved as light as a leaf!

Aloha from Honolulu

Comfort Spiral

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Evalinn said...

Luckily someone came to the rescue! ;-)