Wednesday, August 26, 2009


God bless Dan Ackroyd and Jane Curtain for the SNL News segment and that famous line Ackroyd would deliver before going off on whatever ridiculousness Jane had just been spouting. I have always wanted the opportunity to say that to someone and only in the most malicious way.

Unfortunately, I am still waiting for that opportunity, but I so had the urge today because I was truly dealing with an ignorant slut. Fucking uneducated idiots I have to work with drive me nuts. This one happens to be the same person I went off on a blog rant on back in June. Now that I think of it it was also one of the last times I worked with her.

So I'm not going to bore you with RGB conversion to CMYK and what happens to color as a result....oh wait, I just did....if you're still there just bear with me. This is a client who, let's just say, is sharp as a marble. You know the kind, you explain something to them and they give you this blank stare and say "uhuh" like they have a clue when in reality what's going through their teeny little walnut size brain is "I wonder if my hair grows when I sleep," or something equally as cerebral.

This is the same girl who told me her husband rebroke his arm after a "fall". The first break was snowboarding and the second break was because she jumped on his back and he broke it again in the fall she created. Now if it was some fun bedroom thing it might have been understandable, but this was just because she's stupid. The real scary thing is - she has kids. My God I feel for those kids being raised by this cracker ass, trailer trash, lame brain.

Ooo, I'm feeling better already. I seldom use this blog as a platform to grouse, but I've got to tell you, this beats drinking over my problems which of course doesn't make a problem go away, it just delays having to face it. Glad I don't go there anymore.

I just wish this idiot's name was Jane because just to make myself feel even better I have always want to say, "Jane, you ignorant slut."

5 comments:

the walking man said...

No need for personal conversation with a client...unless you are the therapist. BUT I can see where an increase in rates is called for.

The Peach Tart said...

Sometimes that's the only appropriate line.

Lou said...

Love the clip, made me think of the "teams" in TV history that just clicked..Rowan & Martin, my post about Siskel & Ebert, Sonny & Cher. When one leaves, it is never the same.

Well, rant on. My husband does this, so I'll preach to you what I tell him. Getting so angry about things you cannot change affects your health. Of course anger causes all kinds of physiological changes in the body, none of them good. I tell him he has let the dumb person take a minute off his life!

But then I take hours of my husband's life with my endless, unsolicited opinions;)

Lulda Casadaga said...

I work with the same bitch...go figure! This morning she pissed me off...anyway, when someone really gets my goat I put a whammy on them and just wait. It works for me...:P

I am a very peaceful, sensitive, calm person...but, occasionally the wrath is unleashed!

Why are there so many dumb asses in the world...if you believe...it must be gods cruel joke on man!?

iasa said...

I love using that line, my ex husbands friends are always confused as to why i'm calling him Jane.