Thief proves old enough, just not smart enough
Colorado Springs - A thief walked into a corner store with a shot gun and demanded all the cash from the register. After the cashier put the cash in a bag, the robber spied a bottle of scotch behind the counter on a shelf. He told the cashier to put it in the bag with the money.
The clerk refused and reported saying "I don't believe you are over 21." The robber said he was, but the clerk still refused to give it to him because he wanted proof. At this point the robber took his driver's license out of his wallet and gave it to the clerk. The clerk looked it over, agreed that the man was in fact over 21 and put the bottle of scotch in the bag.
The robber then ran from the store with his loot. The cashier promptly called the police and gave the name and address of the robber that he read from the driver's license.
They arrested the robber two hours later.
So for all of you who thought this was going to be some steamy story of sex, well, you should know me better. I may be sick and twisted, but I try not to be over the top raunchy. I leave that to others.
Now, back on topic. I just love how this clerk kept his cool and took this tool for a fool. Me? I would have been so afraid staring down the barrel of that shot gun, that I would have given the thief the money, the bottle and my shirt if he wanted it. "Just don't shoot me!"
But Mr. Cool Clerk...nope...he is either a genius or much more afraid of the authorities that would bust him for giving booze to a minor than he is of the gun. I say he is a Genius. Sizing up this idiot, whose bravado is tied up in a gun, and challenging his age. Genius! Brilliant!
Cool Clerk: "I can't give you that scotch. You're not old enough to drink."
Tool: "Am too."
Cool Clerk: "You're just going to have to prove it then. Show me some i.d."
Tool (rocking back and forth from one foot to the other as he looks over his shoulder): "You is a idiot! Can't you tell by my whisker that I is over 21?" thieves are always illiterate
Cool Clerk (authoritatively): "I.d. please."
The balls it took to go down that path. I bow to you, Cool Clerk, and your creative quick thinking. Although Tool may not have been the sharpest knife in the drawer, that was some quick thinking.
As for the arrest. Wouldn't you have love to have seen the expression on the face of Tool as he opened the door to the police and stammered, "What the Hell?"