Thursday, August 27, 2009

Splash Fiction Friday 55

Alone and with no help in sight I struggled
in desperation and exhaustion,
bringing to bear my knowledge and energy.
Stay calm. Swim with the current.
But I was getting cold, my body nearing hypothermia.
I have always followed the rules and
I most certainly couldn't disobey this time.
After all, the sign clearly said…

This is a Flash Fiction Friday 55.
If you want to know what the hell that means visit g-man. The challenge is on.
Or Try my Sunday 160.

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

God bless Dan Ackroyd and Jane Curtain for the SNL News segment and that famous line Ackroyd would deliver before going off on whatever ridiculousness Jane had just been spouting. I have always wanted the opportunity to say that to someone and only in the most malicious way.

Unfortunately, I am still waiting for that opportunity, but I so had the urge today because I was truly dealing with an ignorant slut. Fucking uneducated idiots I have to work with drive me nuts. This one happens to be the same person I went off on a blog rant on back in June. Now that I think of it it was also one of the last times I worked with her.

So I'm not going to bore you with RGB conversion to CMYK and what happens to color as a result....oh wait, I just did....if you're still there just bear with me. This is a client who, let's just say, is sharp as a marble. You know the kind, you explain something to them and they give you this blank stare and say "uhuh" like they have a clue when in reality what's going through their teeny little walnut size brain is "I wonder if my hair grows when I sleep," or something equally as cerebral.

This is the same girl who told me her husband rebroke his arm after a "fall". The first break was snowboarding and the second break was because she jumped on his back and he broke it again in the fall she created. Now if it was some fun bedroom thing it might have been understandable, but this was just because she's stupid. The real scary thing is - she has kids. My God I feel for those kids being raised by this cracker ass, trailer trash, lame brain.

Ooo, I'm feeling better already. I seldom use this blog as a platform to grouse, but I've got to tell you, this beats drinking over my problems which of course doesn't make a problem go away, it just delays having to face it. Glad I don't go there anymore.

I just wish this idiot's name was Jane because just to make myself feel even better I have always want to say, "Jane, you ignorant slut."

Sunday, August 23, 2009

Sunday 160 - My Love

The look is coquettish

and makes my heart skip a beat.

Her silky, white skin

beacons to be caressed.

“I love you,” she whispers.

I am the luckiest man on earth.