Saturday, September 3, 2011

Sunday 160 - Winding Down


The last hot breath of summer 
rushed from the hills 
to the valley below. 
Warming with all its might 
the cool air 
left by fall's stealthy visit 
the night before.
______________________________

1. The Sunday 160 only uses EXACTLY 160 characters (including spaces).
2. Keep on schedule - post after 8:00 PM Pacific Time on Saturday.
3. Let me know you have posted via a comment on my site.
(Be sure to mention you have posted a 160. Provide a link if you can)
4. Visit at least one other Sunday 160 writer.
____________________

Thursday, September 1, 2011

55 - It is upon us

Hypnotically entranced before the sacred alter, 
he murmured in a slow inaudible tone. 
He rocked in a rhythmic pattern 
as family members leaned in 
to try to make sense 
of what they perceived 
as a meticulous mantra. 
Finally someone said, 
“Would you please 
step away from the television? 
College football season doesn’t start until Saturday.”
_________________________________________

This is a Flash Fiction Friday 55
hosted by Mr. Knowitall.
For more 55's pay him a visit -
Mr. Knowitall.
_____________________________________________________

If you think Micro Fictions are fun. 
Come join me for a Sunday 160.
A challenge using exactly 160 characters
in a story, poem or writing of your choice.

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

What The Hell Wednesday - Quit Clowning Around

 Last week may have brought you one of the dumbest criminals on record, but this story brings the just plain goofiest....and I love goofy stuff. Here's hoping you do to.

Golfer Mistaken for Clown

BATAVIA, N.Y. - A Massachusetts man whose colorful golf attire was briefly mistaken for a clown outfit has been charged in New York with driving a golf cart while drunk.

The Genesee County sheriff says they got a report that someone dressed as a clown was operating a stolen golf cart in the western New York town of Batavia on Sunday night. Deputies found 37-year-old James Straub, of Stoneham, Mass., driving along a road.

He wasn't dressed as a clown - just wearing some colorful clothing after an outing at Terry Hills Golf Course. But deputies say he was intoxicated.

Straub pleaded not guilty in town court to a misdemeanor count of driving while intoxicated and a lesser charge of refusing to take a breath test. He didn't have a lawyer at his initial appearance.
______________

I must say that I am shocked no....not that someone mistook golf attire for a clown outfit that a golfer was intoxicated. Really, now. Golf is an intense sport.....just like softball. As a matter of fact these sports are so intense and involved the participants require multiple breaks for the libation and smoke of their choice.

Have you ever seen a football, basketball or soccer player stop in the middle of a game Note I didn't mention baseball to smoke and drink? Oh, wait. Europeans play soccer, er, futball so there may very well be smoking and drinking during matches. I know there are in the stands...how else would you explain hooliganism??? You never hear about that sort of thing in the states. What? A brawl in San Francisco when they played the Raiders?? Impossible.

Back to the story. I am so easily distracted. Picture, if you will, James Staub in the 19th hole after his round of golf. Beertender says "Buddy, hand over those car keys, you're too drunk to drive." To which James replies, "F.U. I doan need no stinkin' car to get outta here," runs out to hop in a golf cart and races off into the evening only to be caught in an O.J. Simpson slow motion chase with the local sheriff.

Lights pulsating in signature red and blue. Siren screeching out a staccato Whoop! Whoop! Whoop! Sheriff walking next to the "speeding" cart all the while thinking "This guy really is a clown," while drivers in cars pass by looking at the scene and asking themselves, "What the hell?"